So, it finally arrived. The day were we both agreed in parting. At first it stung, really badly, but the pain subsided fairly quickly. I don’t feel sad at all. I feel relief, like a huge weight on me has been lifted. We both gave it a shot, and although you sucked, I can’t say I didn’t try. I can start to feel like myself now.
I once heard this quote: “My dentist once told me that letting go is like pulling a tooth. When it was pulled out, you’re relieved, but how many times does your tongue run itself over the spot where the tooth once was? Probably a hundred times a day. Just because it was not hurting you doesn’t mean you did not notice it. It leaves a gap and sometimes you see yourself missing it terribly. It’s going to take a while, but it takes time. Should you have kept the tooth? No, because it was causing you so much pain. Therefore, move on and let go.”
The tears have dried. The roots of my heart have been uprooted and they walk in search of a new heart. This is it, for ever, for always.
My love for you is dwindling. Couldn’t be happier.
This was such a mistake…I’m seriously a fool. The same exact thing I felt before I’m feeling it again. We have no depth whatsoever. We talk like acquaintances. We don’t have conversations about ourselves or what we love. We don’t discuss ideas, we don’t discuss events. We discuss our days…in a flat and straightforward manner. Everything you say is ambiguous and undetailed. Let me in. We have no depth as a couple. Nothing that can intertwine us, and most of our memories are in a car or hotel room making out. I want a stronger emotional connection. A bond that can make those memories last. Things I can take with me to college and yearn for when I’m back. I want to know you like the back of my hand, and I want you to know me like the back of yours.
I can’t be with someone that doesn’t share their lives with me. We’re not friends. We’re far beyond that. We’re suppose to share our lives together,and if we can’t barely see each other during the week…the reasonable way is to text it. If we can’t do that right..what is left?
I love you…but I don’t know…
Yeah…you’re not perfect. You’re better than that, you’re real.